Bridge
by xana4
Summary: She finds out the truth about her father. That's why, despite the late hour, she's standing there. His voice doesn't startle her. If anything, it makes her smile softly. "Are you going to jump?"


**I loved Renko and I cried a little bit when he died so here's my one-shot dedicated to him (that I wrote the day before one of my exams). Enjoy ;-)**

The wind blows softly on her hair but she likes it. It's the reason why she's here, looking at the water beneath the bridge. It gives her the quietness she needs to think things through because this was anything but an easy day.

She finally found out the truth about her father, the whole truth. And, after talking to her mother for close to one hour, she needed some time away from everything to think.

That's why, despite the late hour, she's standing there.

His voice doesn't startle her. If anything, it makes her smile softly. "Are you going to jump?"

Kensi shakes her head and but doesn't turn around to face one of her best and closest friends: Mike Renko. She's not sure of what emotions he would be able to read on her eyes if she faced him. "I'm not suicidal."

After two seconds of silence, he tries again, his voice soft and soothing. "Do you want to be alone?"

She shrugs because, at the moment, she's not sure of anything. "I don't know."

"Do you want to talk?"

Another shrug of her shoulders follows his question and she really wishes she could give him a better answer. "I'm not sure."

Renko is not one to give up, much like her current partner. "Do you want me to leave?"

And the answer to that question is clear in her mind. It's one she doesn't mind giving him. "No, I want you here."

After a few seconds of comfortable silence, he starts talking once again. "I'm proud of you, for all that's worth."

Kensi lets out a humorless laugh but still refuses to meet his eyes. "I almost killed a man today!"

He argues back. "But you didn't."

She frowns, still finding the water easier to face than him. "You're proud of me because I _almost _killed a man?"

Renko sighs. "It sounds bad when you say it like that…"

Kensi nods. "It's bad. You shouldn't be proud of me."

Renko doesn't allow that to stop him and grabs her arms gently, turning her around so she has no other option but to face him. "You were a lioness, today."

She is well aware that her eyes give out how vulnerable she is at the moment but there's nothing she can do to hide it. "I was weak."

He smiles and kisses the top of her head, a gesture of affection she doesn't allow everyone to do. Hell, not many people would dare to get that close to her. "You must have hit your head pretty hard, then."

Kensi shakes her head, her stubbornness making it hard for her to accept what he's saying. "You weren't even there!"

Renko shrugs and lets go of her, knowing that she won't turn away from him again. "I'm like Hetty. I know everything."

She doesn't let that fool her. "Callen or Sam?"

And Renko doesn't try very hard to keep it a secret, either. "Your partner, actually…"

She shakes her head but the soft smile on her face betrays her real feelings. "He's an idiot."

He knows she doesn't really believe in what she just said but he still defends Deeks. "He cares about you."

"Yeah, that's what makes him an idiot."

Reno can't stand when she talks like that. He knows she has issues but it's his job as her friend to make her see what's really happening. "You're so used to be alone that you can't even accept it when someone other than Sam, Callen and I walks into your life."

"Is that why you're here?"

He shakes his head and sighs. "I'm here because I needed to see you. I'm the one who's weak. I needed to make sure you're okay."

The honesty in his words is nothing new.

Kensi shakes her head, her stubbornness visible. "I'm fine."

Renko laughs and she looks at him weirdly until he clarifies. "Deeks told me you'd say that."

She doesn't have an answer for that one so she stays in silence for a few more seconds. Then, a thought makes her turn to him and ask. "Why are you proud of me?"

Renko smiles softly at her. "You've been trying to find the man who killed your father ever since he was killed. Today, you found out the whole truth. You could have killed him, we both know that. You could have made him pay with his life. But you didn't. You rose above and you didn't kill him. I'm proud of you, Kenz."

"It's been a while since anyone has been proud of me."

Another small laugh follows her comment. "For someone who reads people so well, you suck when it comes to reading the ones who are close to you."

Kensi frowns. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Renko didn't think he would ever have to tell her this. It's way too obvious. However, she seems to need the comfort today. "Callen and Sam have always been proud of you. And I'm sure your partner knows how lucky he is to have you near."

Kensi sighs and wraps her arms around his neck, pulling him in for a hug that he return, wrapping his arms around her waist to pull her closer. Her next words are whispered against his shoulder. "I miss you."

Renko nods and kisses her head, without letting go of her. "I miss you too. I wish I could stay for longer than this."

Kensi pulls back from him and looks him in the eye, knowing that they don't have much time. "How long do we have?"

Renko shrugs and his smile fades. "Just a few more minutes…I don't want to take chances with your safety."

After a few more seconds of silence, she smiles and faces him. "You were right."

Renko frowns, not sure of what she means by that but still happy to see the smile on her face. "I usually am but you could do me a huge favor and tell me about what this time."

Her walls are coming sown and he can see everything. The pain, the love, the care…it's all there when she talks. "I love him. I finally brought myself to admit it."

Renko doesn't have to ask anything because he knows what she's talking about. They've talked about her 'thing' with her partner before. But, today, when she didn't know what to do, the only thing that calmed her down was his voice. And it made her realize her feelings couldn't be denied anymore. "I'm happy for you."

She sighs again, but this time the smile doesn't leave her face. She looks calmer than when he got there. "God, everything's changing…"

He laughs. "That's not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, it seems like a good thing from where I'm standing."

Kensi nods. She can't help but agree with him on that. "Yeah, I guess it is."

Renko looks at the watch and sighs, right before gathering her in his arms for a goodbye hug. "I have to go, now. I'm done stroking your ego."

She whispers against his neck, her worry coming to surface. She knows he's been undercover and that's always dangerous. "Come back soon, Mike."

Renko pulls back and smiles at her. "I will and I hope to see you and Mr. Surfer together when I do."

Kensi smiles and watches him leave, not knowing that this had been their last serious conversation. Not knowing that he would die the next time she saw him…


End file.
